Wonderland
by Jana-S
Summary: Buffy is in Wonderland, and everything is more crazy than the usual. Inspired by the work of Lewis Carrol 'Alice in Wonderland'
1. Wonderland Buffy

Author: Jana Salgueiro Pairing: B/F Disclaimer: The characthers belong to Joss Whedon, Alice in wonderland and Thru the looking glass belong to Lewis Carrol. Summary: Buffy finds herself traped in a crazy world, with talking roses and lots of things that doesn't make any sense. Totally AU. Note: The poem belongs to Drummond, it's a poem in portuguese, so if it's more weird than the usual it's my fault for the bad translation. Big thanks to David for doing the Beta reading thing.  
  
Wonderland  
  
Chapter One - Of Bunnies and Roses  
  
Buffy saw herself laying under a big tree, in the middle of a vast camp with nothing else besides grass as far as her eye could see. "I wonder how I ended up being here?" Buffy said to herself.  
  
Just then, she saw Anya dressed in a Bunny suit running around, her hands full of cash, and her pockets too.  
  
"Anya" Buffy said "Where are you going? And what are you doing with this bunny suit, I always thought you hated bunnies".  
  
"I'm lost in somebody else's mind, lost my track while on mine, and all I have left is this bunch of money, that I have nowhere to put" she said as if it was the most obvious thing.  
  
"What on earth are you talking about Anya?" Buffy asked completely lost.  
  
"I'm talking about this". She pointed to the big tree. "It's been standing here for over an hour, and it won't come down, how will the poor squirrels live!?" she asked desperately.  
  
"I'm not the one to answer that, anyway, enough with the crazy talk, where am I? How do I get out of here?" Buffy asked.  
  
"Obviously not by doing that my dear, you can't just ask questions and expect answers, we are all here, and it's your fault actually" she said pointing to Buffy accusingly.  
  
"And how's that?" Buffy asked crossing her arms.  
  
"We'll aren't you a cute girl, I'll tell you a poem and you figure it out by yourself, I'm almost running out of time, and money" she said as if Buffy was a little girl.  
  
"If I let you tell me this poem, will you give me some answers?" Buffy asked tired of trying any form of communication with the ex-demon.  
  
"Of course I will, why shouldn't I?".  
  
"Maybe because you're crazy" Buffy murmured.  
  
"Any way, the poem is named My disgrace -  
  
My disgrace, no, it's not being a poet, Nor in the land of love not to have an echo, And my Angel from God, my planet Treat me the way a doll is treated...  
  
Not to walk with broken elbows, To have a pillow that is hard as rock I know... the world is a lost swamp Whose sun (And I can only wish) is money...  
  
My disgrace, Oh my pure lady, That makes me blaspheme with my breast, It is to have to write a poem, And to not have a twenty for a candle.  
  
"There, I like the part with the Sun, there is money involved" Anya said smiling proudly.  
  
"And how is that gonna help me to get out of here?" Buffy asked skeptically.  
  
"It won't, it takes time, but if you are really desperate, just follow the path with the red roses" Anya said pointing to nothing but more grass.  
  
"But there are no red roses...". Just then roses started to grow, all of them forming a path that followed all the way to the south.  
  
"I should go now, the race is about to start, and I don't want to miss the tea afterwards." Anya said jumping to the other way.  
  
"Okay, thanks, for you help" Buffy said following the path. She started following the path, and after a while stopped to rest.  
  
"Wow, I never thought I had to walk so much" she looked over her shoulder to see how far she had gone, only to realize she never even moved, the big tree was still there, but Anya was nowhere to be found. "What!? That's really annoying, I walked for hours, how come I never left the same spot?" Buffy asked herself, annoyed.  
  
"You went the wrong way" Buffy heard a little voice say.  
  
"Who's there?" she asked seeing no one,  
  
"We are here" said one of the roses.  
  
"Roses can talk?" Buffy asked, giving a little nervous laugh.  
  
"If you can, why shouldn't we?" The rose asked back indignated  
  
"Be... because I'm human".  
  
"No you're not, you're a Slayer, but let's leave this for a more important day, today is Tuesday, it's all about the dumb questions and stupid remarks" the rose said.  
  
"That doesn't make any sense" Buffy said sitting for a bit on the floor, she was tired after all that walking.  
  
"You seem to be doing very well for a first timer, but please, do tell us child, are you lost?" asked the rose behind her.  
  
"First of all, I'm not a child, and yes, I'm lost, I was supposed to follow this path of roses, but I can't seem to leave the same spot" she said nervously.  
  
"My darling, that's because you're going the wrong way" the rose said matter-of-factly.  
  
"But the other way doesn't have any roses" Buffy said pointing to the other way.  
  
"If we were to show you the way, we wouldn't do it so easy my dear, you have to go in the opposite direction, and then we will show you the way you've passed" the higher rose told her.  
  
"So you're saying, that all I need to do is to follow in the opposite direction of the roses, that you'll just start growing on the way I've been, but not showing me the way at all?" Buffy asked confused.  
  
"That's right" four roses said in unison. "But you should start walking, you wouldn't like to get to the end of the path after the cheese is gone".  
  
"I will" Buffy said, wondering how in hell she ended up in this crazy place.  
  
As Buffy started to walk, some flowers screamed in unison "We are right behind you, don't look back".  
  
And Buffy kept walking, to an unseen path followed by talking roses, hoping to find a way out of this crazy place. "Nothing here makes sense" Buffy said to herself, heading south.  
  
TBC 


	2. The black cat

Note: The little song at the end belongs to me, that's why it's crappy.  
  
Chapter two - The Black Cat  
  
After walking for a while, Buffy found herself standing in front of what looked like a little house, with little furniture around it, and sitting on a chair in front of a small table, she could she the back of a woman, with cat ears and black leather clothes, the woman was about her size, and she was having problems fitting on the that was too small for her.  
  
"Hello?" Buffy asked the woman seating on the chair.  
  
"B?" Faith turned around, her face had a cat kinda face, with cat mustache, and a cat nose.  
  
"Faith!? Why do you look like a cat" Buffy asked hugging Faith.  
  
"I don't know, suddenly I found myself here, Anya passed by me, said something about a race and a tea party, she said you were coming too, so I decided to wait for you sitting here."  
  
Faith took a look at herself and then at Buffy.  
  
"I don't know why I look like a cat, but I liked the outfit, black leather is wicked, but, why are you wearing this weird blue dress B?" she asked pointing to Buffy's outfit.  
  
Buffy took a look at herself for the first time, she was wearing a blue dress with what looked like a white apron. "Now that you mentioned it, I hadn't realized what I was wearing this whole time, but nothing here makes any kind of sense anyway."  
  
"You're right B, I was drinking tea with flying cups and all" she said pointing to the table she was sitting at.  
  
Just then Buffy saw that everything was actually flying, the kettle served some tea at a small cup, and the cup came flying towards Buffy .  
  
"Wow, everything here is so... alive" she exclaimed.  
  
"Yeah, so I kinda have my own ideas as for what this is all about" Faith said sitting on a chair and drinking some of the tea and making a face to it. "There should be at least some coffee around here."  
  
"What did you figure out?" Buffy asked drinking some tea herself.  
  
"Well, at first I thought I was dreaming, but you are here, and it doesn't feel like a slayer dream" she said looking around to prove her point. "We could be in another dimension, but I can't seem to know why we would be here anyway, I don't remember fighting any weird demons lately."  
  
"True, then what could this be? I don't remember what I was doing before coming here either" Buffy said.  
  
"Yeah, maybe the council drugged us and we are going to England so they can kill us" Faith said, a bit angry.  
  
"Don't think so Faith, in any case, we've seen Anya around, I'll take my guess and say we might end up finding Giles too."  
  
"Guess so, so I'm thinking, sitting here drinking tea won't help us" Faith said standing up.  
  
"Guess you're right" Buffy said standing up too.  
  
"I just got this weird felling ya know? Like, there is something weirdly familiar here" Faith said looking at Buffy, hoping she would have the answer.  
  
"I got the same feeling too, maybe we'll remember something later, don't worry Faith, we'll figure out what's going on here" Buffy said taking Faith's hand, walking south once again.  
  
"Hope so" Faith said looking at their linked hands, something came to her mind. "B, what is the last thing you remember?"  
  
"Uh... You and me, we're hanging out a lot together" Buffy said.  
  
"Yeah B, but after that, there's more after that, look at us, holding hands" Faith said shaking their hands.  
  
Buffy looked at their hands, she hadn't even realized they were holding hands "We... We are dating" she said remembering their first kiss.  
  
"Yes! We're dating, and it's new, but, why couldn't we remember it before?" Faith asked bringing Buffy closer.  
  
"Don't know, do you think it has something to do with why we are here?" Buffy asked leaning in to kiss Faith.  
  
"I think", Faith broke the kiss. "It might, but we still need to find some answers, so I'll say, let's first find out what's going on, and then, we'll have some fun" she gave Buffy a last kiss and started walking again, with Buffy right behind her.  
  
"Okay" Buffy said. She walked a bit faster to stay right beside Faith, and took her hand "But let's do it together."  
  
"Of course B" Faith said giving Buffy a light kiss on her cheek.  
  
The girls resumed their walking, each lost in their own thoughts as to why they were there. Being followed by the red roses that were singing all happily.  
  
"A slayer and a cat, No stake and no hat, How they're gonna get Into the end of their track? A slayer and a cat, Walking in the path, How they're gonna get The answers..."  
  
"Shut up" Faith said angrily to the roses. "Sorry B, they were getting on my nerves."  
  
TBC  
  
Thanks for the reviews. Sadly Lindsey wont be on the fic, mostly 'cuz I only watch Angel when Faith is in it, so, I'm not very 'in touch' with his character to write him. Hope you'll keep reading.  
  
Jana S. 


	3. The slayers and a Caterpillar

Note: This poem belongs to Drummond Big thanks to David for doing the Beta reading thing.  
  
Wonderland 3 - The Slayers and a Caterpillar  
  
They found a weird forest on the way, and apparently the red roses stopped following them, saying that the rest of the way they had to figure it out alone. The forest itself was weird because everything in it was double sized, like a small plant would be the size of a tree.  
  
Taking a look at the forest they found a giant mushroom, and sitting on the top of if was Dawn, dressed as a caterpillar.  
  
"Halt those who come, say your name, creatures from down under" Dawn said in a high pitched voice.  
  
"Dawn? It's me Buffy, and Faith, care to say where we are?" Buffy said trying to get a better look at Dawn, the mushroom was a bit taller than her.  
  
"You are in my house, and my rules you shall follow, answer only my questions and your questions I'll answer."  
  
"What's that in your hand?" Faith asked standing on a stone to take a better look at Dawn.  
  
"My toy, it's fun to use, and makes me feel funny" Dawn said pointing to the Opium in her hand.  
  
"Dawn, that's opium, you shouldn't be using that" Buffy exclaimed.  
  
"No problems, I can see things clearer now, listen to this -  
  
To born Once and again Indefinitely Like a plant always arising From the first seed; Think the good day Until create clarity And in it discover The first syllable Of the first song-  
  
"It's very pretty, that's how I'm feeling right now" she said proudly.  
  
"That's fucked up" Faith said. "Come on kiddo, tell us what's going on."  
  
"You are going on, and so is Buffy, so, you two are going on, there's a race going on too, make a better question."  
  
"Why are you dressed as a caterpillar?" Buffy asked.  
  
"No reason at all, probably 'cuz you're dressed like Alice, and Faith looks like a cat" Dawn said taking a long drag at her opium.  
  
"Alice! That's it, Alice in Wonderland, we are in Wonderland!" Buffy said happily.  
  
"And how in hell did we end up in Wonderland in the first place?" Faith asked annoyed.  
  
"We'll figure this out Faith" Buffy said putting her hand on Faith's shoulder to console the girl, taking a look at Dawn, who seemed to be having a great amount of fun just by looking at her hand and laughing hysterically. "Don't think Dawn has the answers right now anyway, maybe we just should keep on walking south and see what we'll find out, taking our priority to find Giles."  
  
"You're right, but I'm placing my bets that Giles will be as crazy as everyone in here" Faith said taking Buffy's hand.  
  
"I know, but it's always worth a try."  
  
They resumed walking, and they could hear Dawn reciting some more of her crazy poetry.  
  
"-The old flame of love It never is fading And it shines the PJ's Bought by her lover-"  
  
"The kid is really high B" Faith said smirking to Dawn's poem.  
  
"Yes, when we get to our normal world we'll have a little talk" Buffy said in her 'mom' tone.  
  
"Dude, stop being her mother sometimes, give the kid some points, she's not even here, that was fucked-up-Dawn-from-Wonderland." Faith said a bit angry.  
  
"Sorry Faith, I kinda forgot that" Buffy said giving Faith her best puppy eyes.  
  
"Five by five B, let's just keep walking and find a way to get the hell out of here" Faith said smiling at Buffy and caressing her hand.  
  
"Why do you think we ended up here anyway?" Faith asked after a while.  
  
"Dunno, the Alice in Wonderland books were my favorite, my mom would read for me when I was little, I even had a cat named Dinah" Buffy said a bit sad, remembering her dead mother.  
  
"Sorry for your mom B, she really was a great woman" Faith said kissing Buffy's hands.  
  
"Thanks Fai, let's go, I wanna leave this place as fast as we can."  
  
"Catch me if you can blondie." Faith started to run, and Buffy right behind her, both of them laughing and smiling.  
  
TBC  
  
Jana S. 


	4. The Rocker Hare

Note: The poem belongs to Augusto dos Anjos, and it's called The Fantastic Coffin Thank you a lot David, you're the man :D  
  
Wonderland 4 - The Rocker Hare  
  
"Ouch!" said Faith hitting her head on a tree. "Didn't see that here before."  
  
"You okay Fai?" Buffy asked caressing Faith's head.  
  
"Fine, this stupid tree came out of nowhere" she said pointing to the tree. Just then, someone jumped out of it.  
  
"I see you've reached me before I could reach you" said Spike with hare ears and dark make-up eyes. "So, what brings two slayers to my place?"  
  
"Spike!" Faith said laughing. "And I thought this place couldn't get any crazier."  
  
"We are lost Spike, and we don't know what's going on" Buffy said.  
  
"Oh!! That's it? I can tell you what's going on, it's that annoying race, and they are all after me, stupid dogs" Spike said pissed off. "And nobody wants to get late to the tea party, but, it's not even five o'clock, it's no fun drinking tea at any time besides five o'clock".  
  
"'Cuz you're British?" Faith asked.  
  
"No! Because it's the bloody rule, it's says in the book, five o'clock it's time to drink tea, if you don't drink it you'll go to jail, and the Queens will put you on trial."  
  
"Queens? Which Queens?" asked Buffy.  
  
"The red and the white Queen, they love a good riddle, so most of the trials you need to solve a riddle of theirs, that's why I only drink my tea at five o'clock, not to mention, being in prison would ruin my rock singer fame" Spike said making a I'm-too-good-to-be-true pose.  
  
"That really doesn't clarify much, good thing I love a good riddle" said Faith.  
  
"Rock singer fame?" asked Buffy astonished.  
  
"Yeah, I sing, quite good, here, listen to my newest song, it's called The Fantastic Coffin -  
  
Quickly went the coffin, and, in it, included, Ashes, skull boxes, cartilage Native, like in the dreams of the wild, Of obscure abstract aberrations!  
  
Maybe the muses are in this coffin, Maybe my father! Hoffmaniacs visions, Filled my encephalon of images, The monist energy of the world, At midnight, entered deep, In my extraordinary full brain...  
  
It was late! It was very cold, In the street only the dark coffin, That was continuing it's stroll"  
  
"It's hum... dark" Buffy said a bit awkwardly.  
  
"Yeah, but quite nice" complemented Faith.  
  
"It's a masterpiece, took me five seconds to compose it, and three hours to write it down. Express all my feelings, and it's like a reminder of my death status" Spike said feeling proud.  
  
"At least you know you're dead, but anyway, how can we find the exit?" asked Faith.  
  
"You don't, the exit finds you, you're thinking that you can make your own way, but that's the opposite that actually happens, your destiny and final goal is what makes you follow the path. Sad to know, all the decisions you make, even the bad ones, are already predestinated" Spike said taking out a bottle of bourbon and drinking half of it in just one gulp.  
  
"But, before you get drunk, tell us, do you know where Giles is?" Buffy asked trying to not get into the 'destiny' talk.  
  
"I never get drunk, alcohol is the same as water, but with a funny taste. Now, Giles, he must be drinking his five o'clock tea, follow right ahead, he's gonna be alone in a giant table, I like to drink tea with him, but I'm always late, so I'll only get there when the clock hits five o'clock again, which means it won't be long, time here is a funny thing" he said giving Buffy a small watch.  
  
"Weird" said Buffy taking a look at the time, the watch would change the time every now and then, first it marked three o'clock, and then it was one in the morning, and now it was marking four thirty.  
  
"Five o'clock will be in ten paces, start walking" the watch said in a robotic kind of voice.  
  
"Wicked watch Spike" Faith said taking a look at it.  
  
"Yeah, now sod off, I'll meet you at the end of the race, right now I need to run before the doggies can catch me" he said taking three bottles of bourbon with him.  
  
"Okay, so Fai, let's go find Giles, I can't believe we are this close to finding him and getting the proper answers" Buffy said cheerfully.  
  
"Somehow I feel like he won't be that much of a help" Faith said, but walking with Buffy. "If all we need to find him is ten paces, than it won't be that bad' Faith thought.  
  
TBC 


	5. Five O'Clock Tea

Authors Notes: The poem in this fic belongs to Agusto dos Anjos, and it's called "The idea" Big thanks for David for beat reading this fic, luv ya David :D  
  
Wonderland 5 - Five O' Clock Tea  
  
Exactly ten paces later the Slayers found Giles, wearing a huge hat, drinking his tea, around him were dozens of clocks and watches, all of them marking five o'clock.  
  
"We found him, we found Giles" said Buffy enthusiastic. "We are finally going to find our way out of this place."  
  
"Maybe we should try to talk to him first, before getting our hopes that high B." Faith was suspicious about how Giles would behave.  
  
"You're right" Buffy said to her, and then addressing Giles, she said "Giles, we are lost in this place and can't find our way out, could you help us?"  
  
"As if help was needed, you know where you are, therefore you should know how to escape it" he said a bit arrogantly. "I have better things to do with my voice, let me get back to what I was doing before you came." Giles took a drink from his tea and started to recite a poem  
  
"Where does it come from?! From what material Come this light that over the nebula Falls the crypt with mysterious questions Like the stalactite of a cave?  
  
Comes from the psycogenetics and high fight From the sheaf of angry molecules That, in wonderful disintegration, Deliberate, and then, wants and performs.  
  
Comes from the encephalon that drowns together Gets next to the larynx cord Tuberculosis, subtle, minimum, rachitic  
  
Brakes the centripetal force that ties together But, suddenly, and almost dead, dashes At the tip of the paralytic tongue"  
  
"I like to call it The Idea. Now I'm free to speak with you. When my thoughts come I need to work fast, otherwise I'll lose it" he said a bit cheaply.  
  
"This is obscure and dark, I liked it" Faith said. "But leave it behind, I don't know why everyone likes to suddenly say a poem or a song out of nowhere, it isn't fun, and it just make us lose time."  
  
"As if time moved that fast" Giles pointed to the clock behind him. It was still marking five o'clock. "You can't waste time, but my dear, time is what wastes you. Before you ask another dumb question, tell me, have any of you seen Spike?" He took a small sip of his tea, and removed his glasses off in order to clean them.  
  
"Yeah we saw him. He said he was coming over, something about a race and a tea party. Everyone is crazy here" Faith said.  
  
"Oh! Wonderful, he'll drink his five o'clock tea with me. It's always five o'clock here, but Spike always manages to get here one hour late" Giles said and smiled.  
  
"What's with this hat?" Buffy asked and took it off of Giles head.  
  
"My precious, give it back, my precious." Giles ran after Buffy trying to get the hat, speaking in a raspy greedy voice. "The precious belongs to me" he snapped, grabbing the hat out of Buffy's hand. "Never take it away from me" he said with his regular angry voice.  
  
"That really was fucked up" Faith said. "I think we should leave B, Giles is just as crazy as everybody else in here."  
  
"Guess you're right, which way should we go though?"  
  
"You don't need to go anywhere, stay put and you'll be on the right place. You can't follow your way, the way follows you. Just wait for it to come" Giles said admiring his own hat.  
  
"Thanks G-man, but, we are going to find what and who?" Faith asked.  
  
"The only way to get out of here, if that's what you really want to, is to find the White and the Red Queens, and you'll only leave if you manage to answer her riddle correctly. But the Queens won't be the ones to perform the riddle, they'll only talk to you to congratulate you after you answer it" Giles said, and turned around when he saw Spike jumping his way over to the table.  
  
"Let's just go, staying here and listening to these two talking will cause massive brain damage" Buffy said, taking Faith's hand and walking away from Giles and Spike.  
  
They hadn't even finished their first pace when they could see a large door, on the top of it was written in giant words "ANSWER THE RIDDLE, AND YOU MAY COME IN"  
  
"What riddle?" Buffy asked to the door, hoping it would answer her.  
  
"I don't think the door will answer you Buff" said Xander coming out of the shadows, dressed as a white soldier riding a red horse, holding in his left hand was a huge white shield, and in his right a large shiny sword.  
  
TBC 


	6. The riddle

This little song was found in my book of Edgar Allan Poe Big thanks for David, you're a big helper!!  
  
Wonderland 6 - The Knight's Riddle  
  
"Xander!" Buffy exclaimed and hugged him.  
  
"Xander, look at you, you're all mighty" said Faith giving him a nod.  
  
"Yeah, isn't it great? I'm the Queens' head knight" he said showing the girls his sword. "I even get to carry this sword."  
  
They could hear noise coming out of the woods, some kind of song.  
  
"Fifteen men on the dead man's chest Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of rum! Fetch after the rum, Darby!"  
  
And out of the woods came fifteen soldiers, all armed, but their armor wasn't good as Xander's.  
  
"Hold there" Xander said raising his sword. "No need for alarm. These two are friends of mine, and they are here to answer the riddle. Go back to your posts at the bar, and order me some rum too."  
  
"Your army?" Buffy asked pointing to the retreating men.  
  
"My men, very well trained, they can face any kind of danger" Xander said proudly.  
  
"Yeah, even fetch some rum" Faith said mockingly.  
  
"Well, we are celebrating, we just caught the hare, and now he's dust."  
  
"You mean Spike?" Buffy asked.  
  
"Yeah, I think it's him. He was an evil hare, he deserved to be dust" Xander said.  
  
"Well, I agree with Xander here" Faith said.  
  
"I guess you're right, he never did anything good in his entire un-dead life" Buffy said, and then looked at the door. "So, we need to answer a riddle."  
  
"Not so fast little lady" Xander said. "First, what do you want on the other side of this door?"  
  
"We want to talk to the Queens, so they'll let us out of here" Faith said.  
  
"That will only be after the tea party, today is an important day. The tea party is something big here, even the evil hare is going" Xander said.  
  
"I thought Spike was dead" Buffy said annoyed.  
  
"I never said he was dead, I only said that he was dust. He lost the race, the dogs won."  
  
"The race... there was a race going on. And here I was, all feeling happy about his death" Faith said disappointed.  
  
"But similar things will happen" Xander said in a weird tone. "So, any of you seen Anya?" he asked with his usual voice.  
  
"She was dressed in a bunny suit. Saw her some time ago, don't know where she went" Buffy said.  
  
"I guess she's already at the tea party, they are all waiting for us, do you want to hear the riddle now?" Xander asked.  
  
"Shoot" Faith said.  
  
"Are you really ready for that? I'll give you three chances. If you don't get the answer after the third chance, you'll both die" he said passing his sword close to both slayers necks.  
  
"We are, damn it, just say it" Faith said, angry.  
  
"No need to go hostile on me, I'm just following the rules."  
  
"We are sorry Xand, but please, just say the riddle. And then we'll think of the answer, and when we feel we are sure of the answer we will tell you" Buffy said  
  
"Okay, here it goes.  
  
-The poor people have it, The rich people want it, The politicians do it all the time, And if you eat it, you will die. What is it?"  
  
- Xander finished the charade and waited for the girls to answer.  
  
"Give us a minute to think" Faith said and she sat on a rock and started to think, Buffy did the same. Both girls thinking to find the correct answer to the riddle.  
  
TBC  
  
This riddle is not only for Faith and Buffy, think you can answer it correctly too?  
  
Jana S. 


	7. The Queens

Poem belongs to Edgar Allan Poe and it's called "A dream within a dream" I want to dedicate this part to David  
  
Who got the right answer? Imzadi, KittieSpit411  
  
Wonderland 7 - Tea Party with the Queens  
  
"Nothing! The answer is nothing" Faith exclaimed to Buffy.  
  
"You think so?" Buffy was unsure about the answer. they had been trying to think of the answer to the riddle for over an hour now.  
  
"Yeah, I mean, just think about it, the poor people own nothing, the rich people want nothing, the politicians only do nothing, and if you eat nothing, you will die!" she said with joy as she saw Buffy's face lighten up.  
  
"I guess you're right, let's tell Xander"  
  
"Xander!" both girls said in unison. "The answer to the riddle is nothing."  
  
"Oh my!" Xander exclaimed "I guess you girls are right, feel free to go through the door, the Queens will be waiting for you."  
  
"Thanks Xand" Buffy said, holding each other's hand both of them walked through the door, what laid after the door was the biggest table Buffy has ever seen, it was so big that you couldn't actually see the end of it.  
  
"Wow."  
  
"With ya on that B" Faith said also mesmerized by the size of the table. It was also full of food and cake, and everyone was there, Anya in her bunny suit, Spike, Xander and his army, Dawn, and Giles who was looking suspiciously at everyone and with his hand on his hat.  
  
"So!" exclaimed a voice behind them. "You two answered the charade correctly, we can talk business now."  
  
"Take a seat and eat something" said another voice, a bit softer than the first.  
  
Both slayers turned around to see the owners of the voices, and were perplexed to find out that the red Queen was Willow and the white Queen was Tara.  
  
"Please slayers, sit down and eat something, you don't need to be introduced to your food do ya?" asked Willow.  
  
"No need for that Will" said Buffy taking a seat, Faith did the same, both slayers were sitting side to side, and in front of them were the Queens.  
  
"Now that we are here, you can figure things out" said Tara taking a sip at her tea.  
  
"Yes, we want to sort everything out" Buffy said. "We want to get out of here and go to our dimension"  
  
"And who said that you are in another dimension?" asked Willow.  
  
"Well, we think we are..." Faith started but felt a bit uncertain about it.  
  
"Well, the only way to get out of here, if you really want to, is to find out where you actually are" Tara said.  
  
"And how can we know?" asked Buffy.  
  
"Well, we you tell you a small poem, and you will know the answer" Willow said.  
  
"Okay, tell us your poem Red" Faith said.  
  
"Take this kiss upon the brow! And, in parting from you now, Thus much let me avow - You are not wrong, who deem That my days have been a dream; Yet if hope has flown away In a night, or in a day, In a vision, or in none, Is it therefore the less gone? All that we see of seem Is but a dream within a dream"  
  
Willow said her part and pointed to Tara, who continued the poem.  
  
"I stand amid the roar Of a surf - tormented shore, And I hold within my hand  
  
Grains of the golden sand -  
  
How few! Yet how they creep Though my fingers to the deep, While I heep - while I weep! Oh god! Can I not grasp Them with a tighter clasp? Oh god! Can I not save One from the pitiless wave? Is all that we see or seem But a dream within a dream"  
  
Tara finished looking at both slayers.  
  
"A dream, we are dreaming" Buffy exclaimed.  
  
"No, only one of you is" Willow said.  
  
"She is right B, you're the one having this dream, I'm just a helper, another part of you, in the form of your love" Faith said disappearing bit by bit.  
  
"I'm dreaming all this" Buffy said and then looked at the foggy Faith "Don't leave, I want you here with me" Buffy said trying to hold her hand.  
  
"I can't, when you wake up I'll be with you" Faith blew Buffy a kiss and disappeared fully.  
  
"And now!" Willow said to everyone that was seated by the table "Let's feast." Everyone cheered and started eating and drinking.  
  
"But, I'm still here" Buffy said.  
  
"Not to worry, eat something darling, this is the chocolate cake, his name is Lindsey, feel free to feast on him" Tara said.  
  
"No I don't want to eat him" Buffy said making a disgusted face at the cake. Suddenly everything started spinning, Buffy fell from her chair and the chocolate cake started to scream at her, everyone was running from side to side. Buffy tried to hide under the table, but a fried chicken was there too and it started to lick her face.  
  
Licking and licking, the licks turned to kisses, the table was a sheet, and Buffy found herself lying in her bed with Faith kissing her all over the face.  
  
"Wake up birthday girl, you slept too much, it's time to put something on and get ready to see your friends" Faith said getting out of the bed.  
  
"A dream..." Buffy murmured.  
  
TBC  
  
Jana S. 


	8. Wake up Buffy

This last part I dedicate to David, my beta-reader. (  
  
Wonderland 8 - The Birthday Party  
  
"A dream..." Buffy murmured.  
  
"Yeah, you were dreaming, you slept a lot, so come on B, everyone is already here" Faith said, taking a black leather outfit for herself.  
  
"I'm up" Buffy said cheerfully, despite the crazy dream she was feeling great today. She got herself a tank top and a pair of jeans pants. Going down the stairs she could see all the Scoobies, plus Spike who was hiding from the sun.  
  
"Happy birthday Buffy" everyone said in unison.  
  
"Thanks you guys" Buffy said still feeling a bit strange because of her dream, and Willow could see it in her face.  
  
"Something wrong Buffy?" Willow asked.  
  
"I just had a crazy dream" Buffy said.  
  
"Oh... you didn't like it?" Willow and Tara asked. "We did a spell to make you have a nice night, you know, so when you woke up you would be feeling better and stronger."  
  
"I do feel better and stronger, but the dream was just... too crazy" Buffy said.  
  
"Well, we asked Dawn which was your favorite book, and the spell was inspired by that, and you would have the company of your soul mate" Willow said giving Buffy's books back. The books were 'Alice in Wonderland' and 'Through the Looking Glass'.  
  
"Thanks" Buffy said taking the books back "It was a bit crazy though"  
  
"Well, maybe the spell combined with your slayer dream might have had another effect that I'm not aware of" Tara said.  
  
"But if you didn't like our present, we can give you something else" Willow said.  
  
"No need for that Will" Buffy said taking Willow's hand, reassuring her. "I liked it, I'm feeling quite good today."  
  
"Well Buff, I hope you like our present" Xander said holdinh Anya's hand Ttook me quite a time to find something like this. But I hope it's something you'll like" he handed her a long box.  
  
"Let's see what's inside" Buffy said opening the present. Inside of it was a very beautiful shiny sword, just like the one that Xander had in her dream. "Thanks Xand, thanks Anya" she said happily, parts of her dream were coming true.  
  
"My present" Giles started. "At first I wasn't sure if you would like it, so I bought you two presents. This one" he gave her a book. "It's a collection of the best poems and some riddles. It's worth a try" he joked when Buffy made a face to the present.  
  
"But it's nice Giles" she said trying to please him.  
  
"I know it isn't something that you like. So I also bought you this DVD." He gave her a DVD of a film named 'Donnie Darko'. "It's an interesting movie, it's about destiny and life in general. If you don't understand this film you can ask me about it and I'll explain it to you" he said grinning.  
  
"Great Giles." Buffy hugged him. "I'll definitely watch it, and look" she pointed to the DVD. "Jake Gyllenhal is in it."  
  
"You like him, right?" Faith asked, a hint of jealousy in her voice.  
  
"Not as much as I like you Faith, don't need to get jealous." Buffy gave Faith a passionate kiss.  
  
"Mmmmmm" Faith moaned. "You have no idea of what my present will be B" Faith whispered so low that only a slayer could hear.  
  
"Oh! Come on, let's get this finished" Buffy joked.  
  
"Well, slayer, I bought something for you too" Spike gave Buffy a small box.  
  
Buffy opened the box, it contained a small gold watch, with the inscription 'Forever'. "Thanks Spike" Buffy thanked him. She took a look at Faith, she looked very jealous. Buffy winked at her and smiled, she knew that tonight her present would be the best of all.  
  
"Here" Dawn said giving Buffy her present. "It's something I did" she said when Buffy opened her present, and saw a portrait with lots of pictures. Most were of her and Faith together, but there were pictures of her and all of the Scoobies.  
  
"Dawn, this is very pretty, I like it a lot" Buffy said hugging Dawn.  
  
The rest of the day they had a good time. For the first time Buffy never had a disaster on her birthday so that was just perfect for her. The night events would definitely be the best ones.  
  
And they lived happily ever after.  
  
END  
  
Authors Note: And that's it guys, I so wanted to finish this with a cheezy line. Thanks for all the FB, and for reading :) I'm really sorry for the delay, but I was having some major computer/internet problems, only managed to get everything fixed last night. Sorry to keep you waiting  
  
Jana S. 


End file.
